Sunday, February 27, 2011

Baffling Pregnancy Products

There are some truly ridiculous pregnancy products out on the market today. While I understand that expectant mothers may want to create some keepsakes and mementos of such a big event, I daresay that there are a few memories that may not really be worth memorializing and reliving.

Recently I joined zulily, a Gilt Group-style sample sale site dedicated to products for children and maternity. While zulily has great sales on lots of wonderful products (email me if you want an invite!), from time to time they do hawk some rather ridiculous products. This week, the belly casts on offer from Proud Body take first prize in my (very unofficial) "Baffling Pregnancy Products" contest.

A belly cast. Really?! For starters, the process for making a belly cast would be not only a bit ridiculous, but potentially uncomfortable. The last thing I really want to do right now is get naked and drape wet plaster across my giant belly and then let it dry (itchy!). And once it dries...what exactly am I supposed to do with it? Well, I suppose you could always perk up that plain plaster cast with some paint:

These look like baby shower games gone very, very wrong.

And again....then what?! Am I going to hang this up in my house with pride? Not a chance. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I'll go ahead and say it: they're all kind of, well, hideous (though I'll admit the  frog is a rather clever use of the shape). Beyond that though, what an incredibly awkward (and personal) thing to show off to friends and neighbors. "Oh that? That's just my naked torso when I was 39 weeks pregnant with Junior -- weren't my breasts magnificent?" Talk about embarrassing Junior.

I mean, I've heard of bronzing baby shoes, but this is just ridiculous....

And no, I'm not ashamed of my pregnancy body. In fact, I'm rather proud of it given that I've managed to keep my weight gain to about 20 lbs., the bulk of which is in my bump, as it should be. That said though, I don't really feel the need to immortalize it in plaster.

Second prize goes to the Mommy Measure Pregnancy Tape. I spied this one in a parenting magazine I was flipping through at my OB/GYN's office last week. Now, you can track your growing belly's progress, marking off those inches with little hearts. Seriously. This can't be a big seller. Most women I know don't even want to know their weight at the doctor's office!

Frankly, I found it upsetting enough to realize that not only did I no longer fit into my own jeans, but I didn't fit into my husband's either (and, at this point, I'm not even close to that). I just can't picture myself pulling this sucker out in a few years time and marveling at how at one point my waistline passed 38" (and then 40"...) inches!

What about you? Spied any baffling pregnancy products out on the market? If so, please share!


Julie said...

Ew ... to all of it!

Brilliant Chic said...

I just have to comment because I saw the bronze belly cast too. Its the craziest product I've ever seen. I pained out loud when yo said the part about "oh that's just my naked torso at 39 weeks......". I mean seriously!

Christy said...

Those are truly ridiculous! I don't remember anything specific -- except pregnancy photo shoots. I know lots of people did them - NOT ME! :)

Karen@StrictlySimpleStyle said...

I'm so glad you spoke up, I thought I was the only one scratching my head at this trend. My sister tried to convince me that I should go have professional maternity pictures taken. There was a local photographer known for taking these pictures and would lend you a flowing white nightgown to wear. Sorry, I'm not the flowing white nightgown sort and I've never regretted the decision. LOL!

Susie @ Maddie's Nest said...

I don't even know what to say about these. Really? I didn't do the pregnancy photos either although it seems like everyone is these days.

Laura@JourneyChic said...

When I was preggo I got a massage at a maternity spa, and saw those body casts. No thanks!! The only record I have of my pregnancy are my blog posts and a few photos we took at home just to show how big my belly was getting. That's all the evidence I need of how huge I was!

I hope you're feeling well - not to much longer now!!

Happiness Is... said...

I totally agree with you. Who wants to remember and memorialize their weight gain and size???

Liz @ It's Great To Be Home said...

Totally bizarre!! And kudos on the 20 pounds, that's impressive!

Patch said...

Oh man...I saw those casts on Zulilly and tried to fool Steve by suggesting we get one. He didn't buy it for a second. I for one am very proud of my blossoming figure, but still, no desire to display a cast of my nude torso anywhere, pregnant or not pregnant, let alone own one. To each her own I suppose!!!! It hasn't even occurred to me to take special photos, either. The ones that really ick me out are the very provocative sexy preggo photos that I am only aware of because people put them on Facebook - YIKES! (I do take the belly shots once a week with my iphone to share with family and friends who ask to see it and memorialize the whole thing - that is enough for me!)
And as for the tape measure thing, where can I get in on this racket of selling a ten cent tape measure and stickers for big bucks?! And won't we have enough clutter to contend with once we have babies/small children, without this kind of crap lying around for years to come?!

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